When I look back to the years before my depression I realise now that I had built a rocky foundation of low self esteem. I practiced self punishing thoughts, I self sabotaged, I lacked a sense of who I was.
I measured myself by unrealistic expectations in terms of beauty and size. I never learnt how to appreciate myself or love myself and it left a door open for depression and anxiety to wheedle it’s way in.
When life got on top of me it wasn’t quick, it was a slow process of wearing me down juggling life, relationship, job, family, growing and a decreasing emotional and mind capacity add this to the already strong feeling of worthlessness it slowly broke my resilience.
I often liken it to dropping a bouncy ball, at the end the ball doesn’t bounce so high and eventually stops bouncing altogether and that is what happened to me. I was extremely resilient – until I wasn’t, and I could no longer get up after being knocked down.
The journey I have been on has included emptying my emotional vessel, developing a strong sense of who I am, nurturing healthy self esteem, practicing self compassion and awareness of self and the world around me.
This is how you build a foundation for resilience and reduce the risk of developing depression, developing the whole person – self knowledge is a super power.
In order to win any battle, we teach the warring parties to understand their enemies, the situation, their own strengths and weaknesses. If we learn these things about ourselves, life and how to handle the things that may come up, we have a better chance at resilience and success, we could even reduce future depression and anxiety.